The Stranger in the Mirror: Your Future Self

Reading time: 3 minutes

Imagine meeting your future self. Would you recognize the person staring back at you?

At 25, I was a young, ambitious consultant, strutting into my first job with a head full of dreams. I was certain I had it all figured out.

At the same time, my friends (equally bright-eyed and eager) and I decided to explore the world of real estate, setting up what we thought would be a lucrative side hustle investment scheme: buying properties in Johannesburg.

Our inaugural investor meeting in a law firm’s boardroom was like a scene from The Wolf of Wall Street - we all wore suits sharp enough to slice bread, and in the middle of the table was a big bucket filled with ice and sufficient drinks to survive the apocalypse.

We were ready to conquer.

But, these are the critical points we discussed during the meeting:

1. The slick look and feel of our website. Why a private investment fund needed a website, I don’t know

2. Registering a company. Only because we all wanted to be able to call ourselves “directors”.

3. After we got those two biggies out of the way, there was a looooong debate about the company’s name. We settled on Ntwadumela Investments, “he who greets with fire”, named after a famous lion from Eternal Enemies, a nature documentary. 

With the drinks flowing, the latter part of the meeting is a haze.

But luckily, I could refer to the meeting minutes to refresh my memory. Yes, this gathering of circus clowns had meeting minutes. The minutes confirmed that we forgot to discuss the primary purpose of the meeting: the properties we intended to buy. 

But, thankfully, the minutes comprehensively documented the plot line of the Eternal Enemies documentary. 

That was our first and last board meeting. 

I look back at the younger me, and I laugh and cringe. What a tool. The Wolf of Wall Street was nothing more than a Puppy of Penny Stocks.

I’m glad to report that I have changed. I’m a family man now, supposedly wiser, and my values and interests firmly set. This time, I’m sure I have it all figured out. Like a big old tree, I expect to stay the same amidst the changing world.

But I bet that 25-year-old me would have told you the same thing. He, too, thought his personality, interests and values were firmly set.

It turns out that he and I both suffer from a cognitive hiccup called The End of History Illusion.

The End of History Illusion theory is based on psychological studies done on over 19,000 people. These studies showed a major mismatch between how people said they had changed in the previous ten years and how they predicted they would change in the next ten years. Although the mismatch is glaring in younger people, even older people underestimate how much they will change in the upcoming years.

Essentially, we think that today represents a “watershed moment” and that the people we are today are roughly the same people we will be for the rest of our lives. We recognize how much we have changed until now, but we underestimate how much we will change in the future.

In a New York Times interview, Daniel Gilbert, one of the authors of the study, said:

“What we never seem to realize is that our future selves will look back and think the very same thing about us. At every age, we think we’re having the last laugh, and at every age, we’re wrong.”

Ten years from now, I wonder if I will look back at the person I am today with the same bemusement I have now remembering the Ntwadumela Investments version of myself.

How much have you changed over the last ten years, and how much do you expect to change?

The moral of the story:

If you are currently on the fence about getting a massive eagle or Taylor Swift’s face tattooed across your back, do your future self a favour and sleep on it for another night or two.

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Rob’s recommendations of the week:

• 📚 Book: Blitzed: Drugs in Nazi Germany by Norman Ohler - Fascinating insights into the level of drug consumption in Nazi Germany - the entire Third Reich, it seems, was on cocaine, heroin, morphine and crystal meth. A great read for WW2 fans.

• 📧 Newsletter: White Belt by

  Peregrino
  - is
  Walther Cantu
  ’s story of starting Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu at 39. It’s a well-written, easy read. I also started my BJJ journey last year in my late 30s. It has been an addictive and humbling experience (which I strongly recommend). Walther’s experience and thoughts are close to mine.

• 📺 TV: Neal Brennan: Crazy Good - One of the funnier Netflix stand-up shows I have watched in a while.